Adrenaline Mob.. and Life After Dream Theater!

     Mike Portnoy doesn't miss a beat. His departure, or split, or whatever you wanna call it, from Dream Theater, was met with many cries of "The sky is falling!", especially in the metal community. But, as it turns out, this split now has given us TWO great bands, almost in the same vein that Dave Mustaine splitting from Metallica gave us the beast known as Megadeth. Dream Theater are doing just fine with the alien-"out of this universe"-level talent of Mike Mangini behind the drumkit (which I just personally witnessed at the Paramount in Huntington, NY last week), and thus, Mike Portnoy hooked up with Russell Allen of Symphony X (vocals), and the LETHAL guitar playing of Mike Orlando (I love John Petrucci, but Mike Orlando is equally as insane!) to form Adrenaline Mob and release the self-debut. Less prog, more bounce, and the best workout CD to come down the pike in awhile (besides Anthrax's latest), this music is perfectly summed up by the word "adrenaline" being in the band name! Ferocious, moshpit-ready tracks like "Undaunted", "Pyschosane", "Hittin' the Wall", and "Feelin' Me" are balanced nicely with melodic, more radio-accessible tracks like, "Indifferent", and the amazingly heartfelt semi-ballad, "All On the Line".. Not a bad song on this disc, it is start-to-finish INCREDIBLE. Grab it, put 300 lbs. on the bench, and get BUSY..

The Return of the KING! EDDIE VH & DIAMOND DAVE ARE BACK

Yes, it's THAT freakin' good...

    So, when radio stations started playing, "Tattoo", the first Van Halen single from the just-released-today, first new album in 28 years with David Lee Roth, "A Different Kind of Truth", I was a little disappointed. I thought that song was mediocre at best, very ho-hum. But then, fantastic little snippets of other songs started leaking onto the internet, and the great Eddie Trunk played a second song on his syndicated Q104.3 (NYC) radio show, titled, "The Trouble With Never", which kicked real ass. My hopes began to raise a bit, as everything I was hearing rocked exceptionally HARD, and truly bled that classic Van Halen sound, even without the incredible high harmonies of Michael Anthony! Don't get me wrong, I love, love, LOVE Sammy Hagar, but to me, Van Halen IS David Lee Roth on vocals, and I wanted nothing more than this new album to succeed and kick more ass than ever could be imagined from the return of two legendary musicians that, unfortunately, haven't gotten along for almost three decades. Well, to my pleasant surprised, iTunes downloaded my pre-ordered new release onto my iPhone at 9am, and, no joke, I haven't shut it off yet, and it's now 7pm. That includes driving around at work all day, driving home, and 45 minutes on the Stairmaster! Even without Michael Anthony in the band (sadly, there's still an issue there), this album is a BEAST. I honestly do not know what could possibly touch this in 2012--it kicks THAT much ass! No "Jump" keyboards, no "I'll Wait" ballads, very live in production, filled with fast rockers & medium tempo groovers, and Eddie slams on guitar (of course), giving a clinic that only he could do! Killer riffs, solos, & songwriting, and David Lee surprises with a great, beyond-solid vocal effort! There was worry that he wouldn't be able to muster the vocal power to sound like the glory days of Van Halen...Well, I gotta tell you, it's pretty damn close! No worries, my friends! And there's not a clunker on this album! "She's the Woman" knocks you for a loop, as it harkens back to "Mean Street", and will have you instantly bobbing your head and smiling with it's titanic groove (link to sample it is coming up in just a few more lines). "Chinatown", "Bullethead", & "Outta Space" are fast-tempo rockers that should give the satisfaction of classic monsters like "On Fire" and "Romeo Delight". "You & Your Blues" and "Stay Frosty", are fun, classic Diamond David-style bluesy rockers that satisfy like a Snickers bar, and the latter of the two should make you feel the whimsical playfulness of "Ice Cream Man". And, "The Trouble With Never", might be the funkiest-yet-hard-rockin' tune that this band has EVER done. Then there's "Big River", which to me, sounds like it shoulda' been on "Women & Children First", with its borderline rock perfection...

     I feel that I'm being perfectly honest here when I say that there's not a stumble or misstep on this album. The cliche of "All Killer, No Filler" definitely applies to the newest VH release. Go buy it, don't steal it like some asshole, and support the boys in their endeavor. After all, 28 years is a LONG time! Hello to Wolfie, and welcome back, EVH, Alex, & Diamond Dave. This new album was worth the wait..

ZAKK WYLDE Gets Roasted!

Some hilarity from the Guitar World Zakk Wylde Roast, from last night:

"How can they roast me? I'm a good Catholic boy," said Zakk Wylde after agreeing to be the guest of honor at the first-ever Guitar WorldRock and Roll Roast.

Last night, he got his answer.

Wylde may be one of the most beloved members of the guitar-playing community, but for two hours last night at The Grove in Anaheim, California, a dais of comedians, musicians -- and a wrestler -- gathered to roast the Wylde child.

On hand were comedians Jim Norton, Jim Florentine and Brian Posehn, as well as former Guns N' Roses bassist Duff McKagan, Slipknot vocalist Corey Taylor, wrestler and Fozzy frontman Chris Jericho and Anthrax guitarist Scott Ian. The night also included video roasts from Steel Panther, the Ultimate Warrior, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Ozzy Osbourne guitarist Gus G, Judas Priest singer Rob Halford and even William Shatner.

"This is a celebrity roast," said roastmaster Sharon Osbourne to kick off the night, "but who forgot to put the word 'celebrity' in quotes?" And with that, the roast was on. And boy, did they let himhave it.

"Zakk, not only are you not a great guitarist, you're not even the best guitarist with a beard on this stage," quipped Norton, referring to fellow roaster Scott Ian. Zakk's guitar playing took a beating all night, with his replacement in Osbourne's band, Gus G, saying: "Zakk, I grew up learning all of your riffs and solos. Then I learned how to play real music."

Although now sober, Wylde couldn't get away from his younger days as a heavy drinker. "Zakk's guitar playing is way less diatonic and way more gin and tonic," said Scott Ian, who brought along some embarrassing photos of the guest of honor to go along with his roasting.

And who could be on stage roasting a man that looks like a modern-day Viking without taking a few shots at his looks. "I didn't know Asgard was a suburb in New Jersey," Taylor said.

But before all was said and done, the Wylde man got his shot at revenge. Before commencing to roast his roasters, Wylde took a moment to remind everyone to keep Tony Iommi in their thoughts as he battles lymphoma, as well as sending a shout-out to his late buddy, Dimebag Darrell. "If Brother Dime was here, this roast would be way more brutal than it already is," he said.

Then Wylde got down to business.

"There's a lot of faces up here, and Sharon's is probably the newest," he said, adding, "I'm kidding, Mom. You don't look a day over artificial."

The big man didn't show his fellow musicians any mercy, either, telling McKagan that he looks like "the white Danny Trejo."

Then it was Scott Ian's turn. Wylde joked with his longtime friend, "Scott's been playing lots of poker lately, and like Anthrax, they can both barely pull a full house,"

Taylor might have taken Wylde's best shot of the night, however, when Wylde said: "Corey Taylor was in a Tenacious D cover band called Pugnacious P. Now he's in a Nickelback cover band called Stone Sour."

As famed celebrity roaster Jeffrey Ross likes to say, "We only roast the ones we love," and last night was no exception. There were few people on the stage or in the room last night that didn't have a great Zakk Wylde memory, and in spite of all the vitriolic humor, there was nothing but love in the room for everyone's favorite Viking guitarist.

...OH HOW I WISH I WAS THERE. But I will definitely be getting that DVD when it comes out!